It's official!

Yes, it's official. I possibly, maybe, more likelihood than not, have at least one regular reader (and I know that you know that I know who you are!).

Mmmm, I'll have to lift my game now. I can't expect to keep the masses interested with my outrageous charm, sharp wit and quirky humour forever. Okay, so maybe "legend in my own lunchbox" springs to mind, but I can live with that...especially since I've lost another 1.1kg!!! Yeah! Woo Hoo! Party streamers and whistles!

Perhaps it seems a little over the top for only a kilogram, but if you don't celebrate the small victories, you could wait all your life for the big ones and never really get to celebrate. Without a doubt, it's the little steps that will add up to a thinner, healthier, happier me. Sure, I'd love for the last 14 kilograms to miraculously dissolve into thin air overnight (and that would be one killer celebration party), but given that I have more chance of walking outside and being kicked by a donkey doing the rumba, I'm going to celebrate the small achievements.

Only a short post tonight as all this excitement has worn me out. Besides, I'm off to bed to see if I can beat the odds on that donkey. You never know...it could happen. I'm sure I saw a dancing cow once...or maybe a horse...or a wombat...a fruit fly even??? Well, I saw something!!!

Battle of the wills

Good vs evil. Head vs heart. Restraint vs indulgence. Fruit vs cake.

I've come to the conclusion that any weight loss journey involves a battle of the wills...and in epic proportion. Every day there are decisions to be made about what to eat, when to eat it, how to cook it, how much exercise to compensate for it...it's never ending. Maybe that's why it's so much easier to be unhealthy. You don't really have to plan for it because it just pretty much happens. You don't have to plan for fast food or a bar of chocolate. You just buy it and eat it. Simple really!

Of course the planning does catch up with you eventally. Planning to go shopping for a bigger outfit. Planning a doctor's visit to work out what could possibly be making you tired all the time. Planning for...well, I think you know what I mean.

Last week was not a good week. I stuck to the plan and really didn't indulge other than the small birthday treat mentioned in an earlier post (all accounted for of course). The result at my weigh-in on Thursday night...only a 100 gram loss. Disheartening to say the least, but I didn't let that push me off track. I decided that I had two options: let it bother me and perhaps negatively impact my weight loss for the week ahead, or just forget about it and press on as motivated and focused as ever. Not really a hard choice, and if my unofficial morning weigh-ins are anything to go by, this week should show a better result. Bring on Thursday night!

Mmmm...vegemite...

I am one very happy little vegemite today. Not one, not two, but three people today commented that they thought that I had lost weight. And I didn't even have to pay them to say it! Even better, two didn't even know that I was on a diet so the hard work must be beginning to pay off, even if I'm struggling to see it myself.

You must be wondering by now whether I blew it with the birthday celebrations on the weekend? Of course I did...n't! Other than a grilled caramel and banana pancake for dessert on my birthday, I was the picture of restraint (modern art perhaps but a picture nonetheless). Steak and vegetables for the main and the small pancake indulgence for dessert. I even handed over the second pancake and half the icecream to the BF just to prove that I could. Very proud of myself I must say.

Food aside, we had a wonderful weekend in Bright. Catherine's cottage was just perfect, even better than it appeared from the website. The owners had thought of everything...wood fire, cosy lighting, beautiful toiletries and an ecletic mix of furniture and decorations that just oozed charm. We enjoyed the ambience so much that on Saturday night we decided to stay in and cook dinner and cosy up with a hot bath each, a couple of bourbons (with Diet Coke, of course) and some DVD's. Just perfect and definitely on our list of "Must Stay Again" cottages.

And then reality hit! Team birthday cake today because I wasn't at work on Friday. Cheesecake, the really gooey creamy kind!! There really wasn't any way that I could politely refuse my own birthday cake after everyone had been generous enough to donate for it. So I had a very small piece and made up for it by eating less for dinner tonight. Now I'm left wondering whether that's my stomach I can hear rumbling or whether perhaps they moved the airport flight path over the weekend?

I guess it would be fair to say that life does get in the way of good intentions sometimes. It's how you deal with it that really makes the difference. If life serves up a birthday, in the purported words of Marie Antoinette: "Let them eat cake." Who can argue with that?

Happy birthday to...me!

Hmmm, 33 today...now what to do with myself? Sooner or later I will have to become a grown up but I'm thinking I can probably fool people for another year. After all, responsibility is over-rated...it's much more fun to put your feet up and just watch the world go by from a gently swaying hammock under a palm tree somewhere in the middle of...

I wish! But I do have the day off work today and I'm going away for a birthday weekend so I'm part way there. A girl has to have her indulgences after all.

I weighed in last night and I had lost another .7kg, which brings me to a grand total of 3.3kg in three weeks. Now that's a birthday present! I'm starting to notice that a few of my clothes no longer try to strangle me. Some of them even seem quite eager to go out now that they are not bursting at the seams and begging for early retirment so that a newer, more voluptous size can take their place. Not that it would be noticeable to anyone else as this stage, but I can see a few small changes here and there.

I need to remember that it is the small changes that will add up to a new me. Like that horrid, spoilt little girl in Charlie and the Chocolate factory, I feel like screaming "but I want it now!" Now, I tell you!! But the weight didn't just appear overnight so I'm guessing it's not likely to just disappear either. So it's one day at a time, one meal at a time, one snack at a time, one point at a time.

By this time next year, I will be a new me...on the outside anyway! Birthday cake anyone?

Hi ho, hi ho...it's off to weigh we go...

I think I'm getting the hang of this blog thing. Kind of strange though because it's like talking to everyone and no-one all at once. It messes with your mind...I wonder whether future generations will have millions of messed up "blogsters" who have overdosed on cyberspace and typed themselves into oblivion? Mmmm...mental note to self: "MUST GET OUT MORE!"

So it's weigh in night again. I haven't decided yet whether I look forward to the experience of the cold metal under my feet as the weights slide ever so precariously over the numbers that will determine my mood for the week ahead. Nerves are definitely present, but then again, that could just be hunger pains from denying myself dinner before I go so that I can be at my lowest possible weight. Me? Obsessed? It's not like I search frantically for the same outfit that I wore last week so that everything is the same, exactly the same!! I don't want to jinx myself, or feel fat all week because I wore a heavy jumper that should probably have had it's own WW membership. Seriously though...

Apart from the Chinese banquet episode, it's been a fairly good week. I've eaten within my points and even managed to save a few to splurge a little on my birthday dinner tomorrow. Psychologically it's been tougher though. I know that I need to exercise more as I have consistently been saving points during the week to spend on the weekend rather than earning extra points by exercising. I think I'm making it harder on myself by eating so little during the week and I can feel my brain starting to whisper "You don't have to do this you know. You could just stop. Even for one little, teeny, tiny day, you could just stop." The initial euphoria of quick weight loss is wearing thin and I feel like I just want to break free and have whatever I feel like. I've worked so hard though and I know that this has to be a lifestyle change. I need to incorporate the craving foods into my program and put some earplugs in to block out the little voice calling "eat me, eat me" from someone's plate of chips across the room.

I never realised that food had a voice until I joined Weight Watchers. Trust me, if you listen closely the next time a plate of chips pass by all cuddled up with a chicken parmiagana, you too will hear them whisper "all this could have been yours..."

Another day, another...

I wish the end to that phrase was "another kilo lost". But then again, after meals out on both Saturday night and for lunch on Sunday, I should probably be thankful that the scales are showing the same weight that they did on Friday.

I was so motivated on the weekend. I was going to stick to the food plan as well as I had for the first two weeks and nothing was going to get in my way...except maybe a Chinese banquet with friends! Not that the banquet was exactly my choice mind you. I did all my research before we left home and I knew just what I should and shouldn't eat, and I was hell bent on ordering a separate, "healthy" option no matter what. I was all set for a great night out when three faces turned to me with a sad look and uttered those fatal words: "The banquet needs four people..."

So what was I to do? I made the best of it and tried my hardest to stay away from the things I shouldn't eat. The spring rolls went to the boys and I sacrificed fried rice for steamed. I had a mere taste of the lemon chicken and the szechuan beef and only a single satay stick with most of the satay scraped off. I made sure that I had only one bourbon with Diet Coke. But when that Banana Fritter landed in front of me so golden and warm and gooey, I gave in. My resolve crumbled and I'm ashamed to say that I ate it, and the ice cream too for good measure. And I loved every minute of it.

So maybe the scales haven't budged, but they haven't gone up either.

The moral of the story? Banana Fritters are food for the soul. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

So who am I?

Okay, so my first post...now where to start? I guess I should start with a little bit of information about me, especially given that this is my blog. So who am I?

For the purposes of this blog, I am crazykarmakitty. Truth is that Karma is really my cat, a crazy, destructive, sweet angel of a kitty, and I wouldn't have him any other way. He is my friend, my confidante, my arch enemy and sometimes I think even the devil all rolled into one. A cat of vast extremes, from the contrasting black and white of his fur to the split personality that emerges when I least expect it.

I am a 32 year old female (okay, so I'm 33 in a few days) with an extreme lazy streak when it comes to exercise and healthy eating. I had about 20 kilograms to lose when I joined Weight Watchers on Thursday 22nd September 2005. I had been doing really well until this weekend and had lost 3 kg without too much pain and suffering. Of course, then the social life got in the way. One Chinese banquet and then one pre-birthday lunch later and I'm guessing I could be facing my first gain on the scales this week. Hmmm...must try harder. I will keep you posted (do you think that the novelty of that pun will wear thin shortly?)